something rumi said

every forest branch moves differently
in the breeze, but as they sway,
they connect at the roots
-rumi

stay human, stay beautiful

today's been a wandering kind of day with my picture files. this morning, i was in a mood to write and share some pictures but what? hmm, hmm?

this "task" has turned into a stretch of time where music became my existence of thoughts and eyes? they drank in the silence of everyday's craziness.

the one with cars always flowing by, contrasting their solid buildings, and beyond it all, is an even older presence of our skyline. these golden hills (at the moment) and their trees... (insert any words you want that describe the aweness and beauty.) it doesnt matter how far the hills are, you can always see every single tree in spite of them being within their clusters.

...

after staring out into my vista, a memory came to mind and thus the reason of picture. here's mally at hyak, wa. we were on our way to lazy f ranch for a family retreat (volunteered to lead arts and crafts for children at camp.) this was a part of our scene and it compelled me to stop. jahren stayed behind with clare so it was just us two. she kept asking me, why? why all trees cut down?

i didnt have an answer for her. so, we stood there for some time before we continued onwards. while driving to lazy f, i played a newly bought cd. "stay human" by michael franti and spearhead, and in that drive, i met "sometimes" and "stay human." they were songs about how sometimes you can be so happy, sometimes you are so alive and sometimes you fall FLAT right onto your face. in spite of it all, the mistakes you make, the happiness you have, you are human. in whatever way, you are always staying human.

ah, "sometimes" played through today's earlier 'stretch of time' and it made me stop to play the song again. again and again.

"blood bubblin thicker than mud,
the heart beats rub a dub dub
show love and love who you know
family wherever you go"
-micahel franti


i love these lines, this truth. blood is thicker than mud and blood is family. but, if you love everyone you know and always show love to anyone who passes your way...you will always have family and how is that not blood?

well. i better stop here. its back to school night, three more nights of this and summer will truly be here.

waiting for rain,
love and light to all

what touches my mood today

what do you do when you know something you've always known? what do you do when you see something new and you know it is also a truth? what do you do when you are a person who feels the truth and walk these steps?

two truths, one path to tread...
what then?
feeling very heavy

staying cool in chaos

ah, the heat has settled down (for now) and so has my school days. assignments and exams has dwindled down to just one more for this upcoming friday. speaking of school, i just finished my online exam for photography-

"one cool image" said my teacher to the class.

we were all to submit only one photo that represents a 'cool' image. obviously, with the heat wave that hit us... well no let me rephrase it, with the heat wave that shitbricked us into misery, i didnt want to take a picture that portrayed swimming, chilled drinks or people cooling down. i decided to look up the dictionary for the word, "cool" and much to my amusement. cool also means blue and green for they are the colors of cool. it can also mean keeping your cool in situations.

maintaining coolness... hmmmmmm


visions swam around in my mind. at first there was this idea of a sexy looking woman sitting on one long end of a conference table. her lips are perfectly glossed and hair is up in a tight bun, her suit is grey with ivory blouse underneath and she has this sensual looking frames that sits right on top of her nose. all around her are screaming men, in their top notch suits and paper's flying about. disagreements are happening and her? shes sitting there staring at the camera with a soft calm smile, untouched.

that would have rocked but where am i going to find all of these stuff in such a short time frame? where would i find an office which would own a beautiful gleaming table? men? where would i find willing models?

suddenly, i thought about my experiences as a mother. especially a pregnant one. how at some times i'd find myself all alone and doing laundry in a laundromat with my restless two year old. egads, it was impossibly hard and i did remember thinking how lucky i was that i only had ONE child besides the one that's growing near my heart. ahh ha, imagine a mother with no choice as she tows her children into a laundromat. she is so pregnant and has young children, they are all down to their last set of clean clothes so doing laundry is mandatory or the school would report your child to CPS. (yes yes im exaggerating) yup. gotta do it. yup, the kids will test your patience but yup, yup and yup, you keep your coolness in the chaos.


here's clare with mally, jahren and eitan.

maybe clare will post more pictures of the photoshoot on her blog. *nudge nudge*

guys, eitan was A D O R A B L E with his pout.

with love for all of you
me

marigolds, reflections of 7 years and mochas

picture taken by clare


(love to all)

my feet likes this

hey everyone,

a few months ago, more than 20 trees were cut down because they were disruptive to the asphalt on the parking lot at our school. as most of you guys know, it was what started this blog. hence the story of this picture. there's this new parking lot a few blocks away from the flat. at first i was disappointed to find such space but wandering past it one night had me laying there, in smack dab middle of the parking lot and clicking away.

"what?! a tree hugger hugging the asphalt?! holy schinkes!" you'd say.

hold it! i'd say back to you, this parking lot is recycled.

*click*

it's been 8 months today

hey bro,


its not the same without you. even now, your death is still surreal.

in the last year and few months of your life, you were pretty much right next to me most of the time.

i used to ask you how you could carry both pairs of glasses and not lose them. you always had one hanging from the front of your shirt and another resting with your eyes or ontop of your head, in this picture, your hand :)

and oftentimes on eitan,


i miss seeing the way you'd squint at me which would then get me nagging at you, "serious case, jc, put your glasses on!!!" you'd smile, roll your eyes, put them on and we'd continue our conversation.

it is not the same. talking to you only in my head or through my feelings. sometimes, i tire of the game with trying to imagine what you'd say back. (doesnt stop me from doing it, though)

well, bro, life is good, it has the same same of this and newness of that. one L up and one L down, as you'd say. its beautiful outside today and you'd be probably working on someone's yard or sitting out front smoking your cigars. who knows? your children would have been here and we'd see the usual scenes of our children playing together.



here's a little something of mally and jahren, they remind me of the old days when clare, lis and i would drive you crazy with our younger selves versus the older and only brother :)

...
then

lis and jc

and now.
<


silly, werent we? and silly, arent they?

hey sisters,
lets continue to drive each other crazy. okay? it is our job as a sister (and as a brother for some) to do so.

*grin*


big tight hugs for everybody in my life

love